Fear, Angst, and Suffering in Redding

It's absolutely insufferable, the fact that I have such a block against doing something that's going to make me feel better and help me out. I've been avoiding it, to the point of telling myself that I'm not letting myself go anywhere fun until it's done and then STILL not doing it, for months. Literally. It's not even the idea of getting it done that's bothering me. I wish I knew what it was. I wish it were easier.